I’ve made a horrible mistake.

Sometimes I think that I didn’t pursue the ideals in my head when I had the opportunity because I thought they wouldn’t be understood. I was a pretty smart kid, I guess. People say that, but I hate hearing it. When I graduated I was off to a great college. I could have done great things, too. Everyone I talked to told me I had the opportunity to do so. My test scores were high. My GPA was high enough. But I never cared. I feel like throughout my life I just observed. 

So I made choices, and I tried to survive. I’ve realized several times that I feel survival is pointless. Survival is just the goal of living until you can’t live any more. Regardless of whether we choose to survive or not, all we effectively have done until the day we die is survived.

So I survived until today, and I’ll survive a bit more, I guess, despite my intentions a few times alone the line. And my thoughts have evolved a time or two, though that hasn’t made me feel any more connected to the rest of people.

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s